Today is Tuesday. I've been disturbed about Athens ever since my return so I hired a tomb raider named Lara Croft, errr Lanthia Cross is her name, what are the chances? I received a report from her today that she could not find any underground cavern underneith the Temple of Zeus. I suspect that she's in cahoots with my arch enemy Charles Winhamthorp, and they've discovered riches or something beneith there. I've since hired a new tomb raider named Dr. John Wills, who's also my chauffer with an honourary doctorate in international mischief. We'll get to the bottom of this yet!

Greece hasn't fallen into the sea yet, and the ground wasn't shaking when I left, but I'll never go back!

My Entourage and I have quickly departed Athens, and not because of the embarrassing performance of the Canadians!!

I was down at the Temple of Zeus this morning, as I'd never actually been!! (Believe it or not), but the weirdest thing happened that sent me scurrying from Athens, and writing in my bloc from first-class.
I was admiring the Corinthian style of the ruins when I tripped over some stupid fallen pillar (apparently it was blown over in some wind storm 150 years ago) anyway, I hit my scepter on the base of the platform and cracked the marble floor bad enough that a chunk dislodged and fell down below! There was a passageway underneath!!! I quickly called my aide to bring me a flashlight, rope ladder, and a mini pick axe. I broke open the hole large enough to descend into the darkness.


It was a 3 metre drop to the middle of a staircase leading down.. I was very excited for this unexpected turn of events. With my aide in tow we proceeded down the stairs and that's when he turned and ran out of there screaming all the way up the ladder. I thought there might be a monster around the corner so I took out my cell phone and had 911 pre-dialed!! There on the wall were the words in burgundy (and Greek) "He who doesn't heed warnings will know on Aug 26 2004 (Dies iovis xxvi augustus mmiv) the land will be swallowed by the sea and all will perish". I followed my aide up the ladder, checked out of the cruise ship and fled back to North America. Turned out my aide Timothy was just frightened by a huge rat, he couldn't read Greek.

Sharon Stone (who can't direct), started to direct a movie at my newly purchased Historic Windermere House. She's a big smoker as we all know and she managed to raze the whole estate to the ground! I've decided to bulldoze it into the lake and use the insurance money for something else. Illustrious Windermere Park will take the place of the old Windermere House.

In other news, I've arrived in Athens with my entourage of friends. We're staying on the Queen Mary II, due to security concerns. Apparently this boat can detect swimmers approaching in the water!! Wow! This ship is one of the biggest passenger ships in the world (and ever built, if not the biggest), it has 15 restaurants and bars, 5 swimming pools, a casino and even a planetarium! It was a mere $800 Million to build, back in 2003.

I decided to buy the Windermere house in Windermere, Ontario, since my name is Edward Windermere!

It was very expensive. 2.8Million $$$!
(Windermere House)

Fluffles ran away :(
I bought a new cat named Puffles-McCuddlypuff.

My neighbour agreed to drop the charges after I threatened to tell his wife about his late night randezvous while she's off at her Antarctic lab (Halley Research Station).

Why are people so stupid? My neighbour, the worthless Charles Winhamthorpe Jr., is sueing me for driving my car through his fence and into his above ground pool!
If he had an in-ground pool then there wouldn't have been so much damage (to his property).!

I bought a new cat yesterday, named Fluffles the cat.

We got back to Toronto on Tuesday. Priscilla was out maxxing her Regent Platinuum card on cheap thrills. England is always a hoot, too bad about the mugger that stole all of Priscillas jewels and cards. Poor thing was trapped in the rain all the way to the Canadian embassy without a cellphone or luxory!

Canada Day was a hoot in England! Priscilla disappeared somewhere, the harlet! I went to the convent garden to celebrate Canada Day at The Maple Leaf pub! The street was closed off due to the amounts of people celebrating there.

I met some new friends and potentially some profitable business partners from Canada.

We fly out as soon as Priscilla returns from her 'walk-about'. I think perhaps she's caught a bit of the crazy. We're staying at the modest Berkeley Hotel.

A little drug addict stole my car on the weekend. Priscilla and I had to drive back to London in the SAME car! It's Canada day tomorrow, which means I'm flying to England to say hi to the Queen (not literally of course).

This weekend Priscilla and I are off to Forest for a fund raiser for drug addicted children. Why do little drug addicts need money anyways? Doesn't make sense to me!
Sounds like they need less money! And where are they getting it from? There's no jobs in Forest!

Priscilla has returned at long last. She managed to get by on a measly $100,000.00 that she found in her car. We've arranged a divorce for year-end citing irreconcilable differences.

I ended my extended vacation and departed for Canada again at the end of may to see if I still had my old job and house and life.. Everything was in order, although I don't know where Priscella has gone. Hopefully she made it out of Egypt. I have instituted a search for her. My previously destroyed mansion has been repaired in my absence, and minus a few irreplaceable items everything is the same as it was before my lapse.

I tried to go into amnesia





But I felt too old, so I left. I'm about to depart the Balearic Islands, where for yet, I don't know.